Softball Sunday

So I'm hanging out at Duke's house with him and his bro. While they play NHL I figured I'd write something. I feel like writing without purpose might be boring to everyone else, but is a good habit to get into. So as of write know I have no idea what I'm going to write about.

I guess I'll start with my most recent trip to the gym. After Steiger completed a full workout week he suggested that we do legs. LEGS. If you know me, then you probably know how great my legs look. I didn't really think I needed to work them out, but I did. Also, one thing a gym can't do is make you grow hair. Yeah you can get surgery and use lasers to remove hair, or if you are Keith Hernandez or Elliot Smith use products to give you the illusion to grow hair on your head, but leg hair is God's will. You are either blessed or cursed. And God has blessed me with the gift of leg hair. As a guy you may be reading this and saying, I have leg hair, in fact I don't even tan, I just grow hair. As a girl you may be saying, I shave my legs what is this guy, no man, talking about leg hair for. Well assholes, you should look at my legs. My legs are a forest, nor or they a barren desert, they have the perfect amount of leg hair. Just enough to make them manly, yet lacking the density of a Sasquatch. My legs are ALMOST perfect. I remember in junior high school running and a girl complementing my legs as I ran. Never Forget. Since then I have taken great pride in my legs.

Everyone should take great pride in something about them. Let's be real people, looks are important. Let's be even more real, my legs are fantastic. If you are reading this, take a moment and please yourself to the visual of my legs. You can picture me streching or running or even walking up stairs. Have you climaxed yet? No. Then let's seal the deal.

We have now entered the Tie portion of this blog. Listen, I don't dress up often, I wouldn't even say that I have good hygiene. But when it comes to dress shirts and ties, I know my shit. Shut your mouth. Stop talking shit and believe it. Or if you are black Be-leed that. I'm fucking awesome at dressing up. Here's a list of my shirts and ties. I'm currently wearing a light blue shirt with a a orange/pink/silver Alfani Tie. Not good enough. Back at home I have a black shirt that goes well with my silver tie. No. I also have a sweet ass green Express shirt that works great with my Orange and Silver Express Tie. I also have great blue tie that works good with my red shirt.

The reason I bring this all up is so if you couldn't get off to the picture, you can now get off to the picture of me wearing any of those shirts and ties with my God delicious legs. You could even use my tie in a sexual manner as long as you use them with my legs. Like tie up my legs with my tie then proceed to stroke your genitals on my thighs.

I'll end this with a religious point. There has to be a God. I mean, evolution makes sense, but my legs were definitely a part of God's Intelligent Design. When Jesus was riding his Dinosaurs back in the day, he didn't give a shit about the sins of man. He sacrificed himself knowing and hoping that His Father would create these legs.